Last week, we received a copy of the sacred "House Rules" of our apartment complex. The topics covered span the logical (I know, not to everyone), the silly, the annoying, the absurd . . . but most of them are good rules. This is a long manual of about 10 pages, and it is full of a lot of lawyer-ish lingo that immediately translates into "blah, blah, blah" in my head.
In truth, I am great at following the rules. Although I may fancy myself an unconventional non-comformist, and was actually Communist Party leader of my high school (a story for another day), the Raggedys are a pretty boring clan. My family and I live in calm and quiet (save for those 4 a.m. feedings) and generally keep to ourselves. Loud parties and property damage are just not our thing.
Here's a sampling of our house rules. Some of them make this place sound like a prison or a mental institution. Some of them make me very curious as to the real-life situation that occurred in violation of these principles in order to inspire their inclusion into the house rules:
- No ball playing of any kind, or other sporting activity on the grounds.
- No tree climbing or playing in trees. Lawns and trees shall not be abused.
- Windows should only be covered with blinds, shades, curtains, or other products designed for window coverings. At no time should inappropriate items, such as bedspreads, sheets, or shower curtains be used as window coverings.
- Toilets shall not be used for any purpose other than those for which they were constructed, no shall any rubbish, diapers . . . or other article be thrown into the toilets.
- No group tour or exhibition of any Apartment or its contents shall be conducted . . .
- Vehicles may not be washed on the Property.
- Commercial Breeding of Pets in apartments or the Property is prohibited.
. . . [F]eeding of animals that are not pets (including squirrels, birds or strays) in apartments or common areas [is prohibited].
- At the end of the summer season, barbeques should be covered with a green or black covering . . .
- Except in the event of a health and safety emergency no individual may enter or exit any apartment through the windows.
What are some of your opinions? What do you think of these rules? What I really want to know, though, is: What are some of the stranger rules you have been subject to, in an apartment, a neighborhood, a city, or in any situation?